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The Best RPG Characters To Hang Out With
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What Activision Needs To Do To Keep Call of Duty FreshWhat Activision Needs To Do To Keep Call of Duty Fresh

This year marks the 10-year anniversary of Call of Duty. Since the release of Call of Duty 2 in 2005, the series has had annual releases. In celebration of the announcement of Call of Duty: Ghosts, we came up with 50 ways for Activision to keep the series fresh.

We're serious about all these:

Create a stronger emphasis on character development – the few occasions that CoD does character development well (Captain Price, Raul Menendez), it ends up being the best parts of the game

Remove the rails – give us a large open world to explore à la Red Dead Redemption

Customizable characters

Design characters with real bone, muscle, and organ structures so that bullets more realistically penetrate their bodies

Give us a story that isn't about exploding nuclear weapons

Throw some Febreze on it

Make all the bad guys invisible – It's called Ghosts after all

Give us guns that shoot lasers

Give us guns that shoot swords

Give us guns that shoot grizzly bears

Give us a gun that shoots atom bombs

Ship it out in a Ziploc bag

Make it a turn-based RPG – that would really throw us for a loop

Let players play as the dogs

Let players play as the kill cam

Let players play as the atom bomb

Cowboy hats

Make the box out of grape-scented scratch-and-sniff material

Make the game take a shower

Set the game in the future, but make players use guns from WWII

Make the guns louder

Hire Christopher Walken impersonators to voice all of the game's grunts

Create destructible environments more like Battlefield – we don't want to just shoot through a wall, we want to bring it down!


Add portal guns

Add all the characters from Team Fortress 2

Have Valve make the game

Add a minigame where players collect pet monsters and train them to fight alongside you

People like short mobile games – what if the main story was only 25 minutes long?

Similar to Assassin's Creed, add famous historical figures. What if in one mission you shrunk down to a microscopic level and entered President Obama's body in order to kill a mutant strain of some designer virus? Then you high-fived Dennis Rodman!

Bring back slappers

Make one level a dream sequence that is done in black and white

Rocket boots

Rocket pants?

Give players a humorous robotic sidekick

Bring back vehicles – let us drive a clown car

Have mimes do all the cutscenes

Add more graphics

Make Zach Galifianakis the main character, but don't tell him what game he's working on during the recording sessions

Add foxes – we're not talking about the animal. We want to see some sexy people in the game

Do everything Irrational did with BioShock Infinite – but change all the characters' names

Add foxes – the actual animals

Tell us the meaning of life – but don't be too serious about it, add some jokes. Entertain us, dummies!

Add cheese – everything is better with cheese

Call of Duty Babies! – it worked for The Muppets

Have a sequence where the player walks through a metal detector and their abs of steel set off the metal detector

Have a scene where the player has to go undercover as a fat kid and wears a T-shirt at the pool

Have a scene where the main character gets in a jam and has to MacGyver his way out of the situation by making a mask out of masking tape

Mullets and beards – just put hair on everything

The twist at the end was that it's all a dream